On 2025

Retrospective and minimal in a really big way

Dec 31, 2025

Today is my 33rd newsletter, and this year, I turned 33. It feels cyclical to close on such a neat coincidence. Thank you, truly, for reading my work. Publishing something each week has been a strange and steady experience. Sometimes I’ve worked on a piece for weeks, sometimes for half an hour. Knowing you’re here reading, replying, or even just opening the email has given me a sense of purpose I’ve hoped for from my writing for a long time.

I don’t usually use this space to talk about myself so directly. Most weeks, I’m sharing work, ideas, art, or things I’m turning over in my head. This one felt a little different — a moment to say thank you to the people who’ve stuck around and given me their time. I don’t take that lightly.

What follows is a small roundup of firsts and bests from the year, not in any particular order.

2026 is the year of the beginner. The year of bending ego toward newness. The year of embracing the suck of not knowing what the heck is going on.

Firsts

Experiences: Beach camping

I went beach camping. Despite my creeping anxiety on the second night that an errant wave could rise up at any time and sweep us to sea, it was awesome. And reader, that creeping anxiety is my everyday companion, so no worries there, we’re used to shoving it aside to find the light!

As a Mid-Atlantic…

(ALSO Ryan is reading a book by Rick Rubin called The Creative Act: A Way of Being and he shared that our ol’ buddy Rick just makes up words and if he feels they should exist, he just rolls with it. This is why I love the rule of linguistics which is, essentially from me a non-linguist, if it’s used with passion, it’s linguistically correct, so why not!!! Like no wonder people think this guy is a genius, he’s making up a whole ass language as he talks to you with such confidence, it has to be impossible not to be like, huh, he just said becomank, ok so that’s new swag, meanwhile he’s just not choosing to find those exacting words in English, which we learned from a linguist friend that is what makes English so hard and the art of writing so beautiful, because we have so few words that it requires such a precise choice.)

Anyways, (this is what it’s like to chat with me IRL), waking up on the beach with coffee in hand and toes in the Gulf of Mexico, reading on the beach and dozing midday as the families piled in to enjoy, and wading out to the sea once they left and it was near dusk, cooking steak chunks on our portable propane grill, a beach fire every night with wood we brought from home, there was such a thrilling and fusing oneness that I haven’t felt since I camped with my friends over the western range and felt that the mountains would accept me, would take me, despite the brininess from the Chesapeake that still poured out of me then.

Experiences: Joy Williams

I met Joy Williams! My favorite author came to town to attend The Stars at Night, the American Short Fiction’s annual gala. I bought a pretty expensive ticket, and reader, I did not chicken out. Through the kindness of her companion, I was able to meet and ask her to sign my copy of The Visiting Privilege. Now I can never open the book again or put my greasy finger oils on it! What magic.

Places: Las Vegas

I went to Las Vegas. I… liked it! Ok, ok, ya got me. I loved it. It was our first anniversary, and Ryan rented a limo from the airport to the hotel as a surprise because I’ve never been in one. We were upgraded to a suite in the Cosmopolitan that overlooked the Caesars Palace fountain and our room had a huge bathtub, so I even got to experience my first Lush bath bombs since, probably, the age of 17 when I left for college.

Things of note: Just how expensive it is compared to the stories I have heard of yore, when free drinks at slots were the regular. Ryan surprised us with a photo shoot to commemorate our first anniversary at all the hot spots, but the best was the view from our room. We didn’t even make it to downtown, but we did visit the Sphere, and that was pretty wild.

It seems to me that Las Vegas is a place that asks for a first and requires a second visit. I’m excited to go back because I already have my future plan down pat, including more Lush bath bombs. It also was a slight bummer that our flight there was delayed by about four hours, so it really ate into our plan.

Oh! And I ate at Vanderpump à Paris because Ryan surprised me with reservations (he is really good at this!!! I don’t social media this fact about him often, but he’s so thoughtful!), we saw Blue Man Group, played the slots, ate at a danky buffet, and saw a gorgeous show that enlightened me to show culture. In a true dystopian moment, I was reading Octavia Butler’s Parable of the Sower, on the plane and finished it while we were there.

Places: Mexico

I went to Mexico. It’s still hard to articulate just how needed and felt the trip was. We went to Mexico City, Oaxaca, San Jose del Pacifico, and Puerto Escondido. I’m still digesting the pyramids, the kindness, the art, the blending of religion and occult, and the antiquity there, but I can say it was nourishing to the marrow.

Bests

Best Book

The Secret History by Donna Tartt I devoured in eight hours straight. What a luxurious read! Mysterious, complex, executed with a literary balance of antiquity and modernity, all set in New England. This was much more fun than I thought it would be.

Best Party

Ryan and Jamey turned 39, and Jamey left for Oregon! So we threw a Birthday Goodbye Party and rented a water slide. If you have a backyard and friends that don’t have bad backs, please consider doing the same before the backs turn bad.

Best Platform

I’ve always hated Goodreads, so I was pretty happy to discover Storygraph a few years ago. I uploaded my list into Pagebound this year, and I love it. I love Storygraph’s quantitative focus, while Pagebound has more qualitative features, like discussing the book on a forum with folks just as excited as you.

Misc.

I put myself out there artistically more in nine months than I have in the last nine years. As of today, I have been happily waitlisted for an essay incubator; received a heartening personalized rejection from DIAGRAM, a place I’ve had my eye on for soooo long; had a pitch accepted by Hyperreal Film Journal; launched this weekly project of 32 and counting essays; have a collection of essays on query; drafted a new collection of short stories; started a new collection of essays; considered what social and public persona mean to my art; and finally feel ready to step into my voice.

Or my ovice, as I mistyped but in the spirit of Rick Rubin, my inner voice is my ovice now. It invokes ovaries and I like it. Thanks, Rick.

For 2026

My wishes for 2026 are to hold a published Voices Carry in my hands, finish and pitch my fiction book proposal, gain an agent, reach 100+ subscribers here, reframe the feelings of failure and humiliation to effort and joy, and start making my own clothes.

Happy New Year, friend. This week’s playlist are some of my favorite tunes for a new calendar. I know, I know, I’m getting off Spotify soon…